How to Build a Writing Habit That Survives Real Life

Being a writer is simple, right? Sit down. Write. Voila.

I often hear people describe a sustainable writing habit as simple as: discipline, a clear desk, and two uninterrupted hours every morning before the rest of the world wakes up.

Lovely? Yes. Effective? Probably. But not always realistic.

Many of us are trying to build a body of work as a writer, while juggling work, children, illness, admin, dishes, texts, deadlines, and let’s face it, the general chaos of being alive.

So for me, building a writing habit has had to be something more than just creating perfect conditions. It has been about creating a rhythm that can survive real life.

I use a Monday Morning Meeting (with myself), Asana task management software, the Fair Play system for managing domestic load, and outsourcing. More on systems I use as a creative and a Mum to overcome my chronically disorganised, messy, late nature here.

I block out two-hour writing sessions when possible, and when a project feels too big or overwhelming, I break it into smaller tasks: e.g. write 100 words, edit scene 14, trim repetition in opening. 

For novels, I break the manuscript down into parts using the Save The Cat structuring framework and take on manageable chunks, one at a time. For childrens books II map the story across page spreads so I can refine individual moments. When it comes to plays, I follow threads of conversation between characters—even if those moments don’t make the final script, they deepen my understanding of voice.

Tiny steps count. Just getting to the desk and getting something done– incremental approaches are powerful and something they’re the only reason anything gets done.

Rule one: if you want to be a writer, you need to write. Often.

Time constraints are real, and we all have our own version of them.

Motherhood has made me far more intentional with my time. It has also made my time feel more fragmented. Between mental load, interruptions, sleep deprivation and constant recalibrating - I have learned to steal moments between naps and breastfeeds and drop offs. And that means, quite simply, that when I can sit down at my desk, I dive right in.

If you live with chronic illness or chronic pain, as I do, you’ll understand that this adds another layer. You honestly do have ‘less time’. I was speaking to my psychologist once about how I felt that my condition ‘stole time from me’, and she said: yes, it is. 

As agonizing as it is to accept this limitation, it’s also reality. No amount of motivation or effort or time management will give me that time back.

So I try to give myself grace, not in a vague, self-care way, but in a practical sense. Some weeks are for deep work. Some weeks are for keeping the wheels on, and both count.
If I try to white-knuckle my way through the hard weeks, all I do is drain my energy reserves, and leave myself even more depleted.

For me, a writing habit that survives real life is not rigid. It is resilient. It bends. It adapts. It makes room for ambition, but also for exhaustion, uncertainty, illness, juggle and joy. 

It’s not about proving to anyone how disciplined I am. It’s proving to myself that I am doing the work.

And at the end of the day, it’s all about making my inner artist proud.